Inner City Farmer

One of the things I hate most about our consumer-driven society is that so few of the products we buy can be fixed. In fact, most of them are designed to break down and be thrown away. It’s called planned obsolescence, and it just might be the single worst thing about our culture.

In response to this abhorrent practice I do my best to buy things (when I actually do go out and buy something) that will last. So when my electric coffee grinder broke last week, the third one to do so in the last six or seven years, I decided that no matter what I wasn’t going to replace it with another cheap electric model designed to die before 2010. Instead I did a little research and discovered the wonders of hand-cranked coffee grinders. They’re quiet. They give you a little exercise. They don’t require electricity. They look fairly stylish. And, yes, they are built to last. I chose one made by Zassenhaus, a German company that produces the Mercedes Benz of coffee grinders.

After several days of use I am happy to report that I am 100 percent satisfied with this product. It takes a little longer to grind my beans in the morning, but that’s a slow time for me anyway (after all, I haven’t had any coffee yet!). I really don’t mind adding three or four minutes of “work” to my day in exchange for the knowledge that I own something that’s guaranteed to last at least 25 years and doesn’t require me to be attached to the Grid. My hand-cranked grinder did cost me about five times as much as a cheap electric one, but I figure it will soon be paying for itself. For anyone interested in buying one of the these beauties I would suggest you get a “knee” model, which can be wedged in between your legs while you crank. I neglected to do so and it’s my one minor complaint.

If I were to be more precise, I would add a question mark to the end of the title. Because I’ve never made a spiral herb garden before. But that didn’t stop me from trying.

Using an amalgamation of tips pulled from several different websites, I succeeded in making a serviceable herb garden this morning. Like sheet mulching, I started with a piece of cardboard to repel the growth of unwanted weeds. On top of this I added a layer of rough sand for drainage, and here is what the result looked like:

Next I started adding the rocks that would form the actual spiral. For some reason I can’t recall, it is important that the spiral flow clock-wise here in the northern hemisphere, just like water down a drain. I used chunks of urbanite, the remains of the back steps I jackhammered to oblivion several years ago.

Then I added a layer of dirt mixed with Revitalizer Compost from the Natural Gardener:

Next I continued with the spiral of rocks and added more compost and dirt:

Finally, I planted my herbs. Proper placement is important. I planted rosemary on the very top because it can handle dry soil and mint at the bottom because it likes wetter conditions. I also put basil and oregano in the ground. I am keeping this garden small to see how it does. If it’s successful, I may build another one in the front of my house. All this took about half an hour to do. I know there are far more elaborate ways to build such a garden, like adding a compost tea drip system in the very middle, but I was looking to make this job as simple as possible, and so far I have succeeded.

After a brief hiatus during which I visited my family in Virginia, completed a lengthy work assignment, and played an inordinate amount of poker, I am back working on the farm. This weekend I prepared my fall garden, planting kale, lettuce, onions, carrots, peas, and onions. I also spread some buckwheat seeds around my nearly barren backyard, hoping to green it up and add some nitrogen to the soil. My plan is to let it grow to about a foot in height, then till it into the soil so that it acts as a “green manure.” I also planted a pomegranate tree on the south side of my house, which stays about ten degrees warmer than the rest of the yard during the winter.

Originally I had planned to start building my cob tool shed right about now, but the Man Cave has proved to be a far more difficult project than I had imagined, requiring the assistance of an electrician, a plumber, and a carpenter. I am hoping to “pay” for the carpenter using the Austin Time Exchange Network where I earned some credit last week editing somebody’s writing. Meanwhile, I am hoping to make a spiral herb garden in the next several days.

As you can see, things are getting busy around here. Luckily, the fall weather is starting to make working outside bearable once again.

And I feel fine.

While the people in this country are freaking out about the “economic crisis” we’re in, the reasons I’m trying to convert my urban lot into a farm become ever clearer. If we entered another Great Depression tomorrow, I would still have eggs to eat and, if I can ever get my garden back in shape, fresh vegetables.

I read an interesting essay on this very subject this morning, and it only confirmed what I’ve been thinking all along. Maybe a little Depression is exactly what this country needs right about now.

I feel fine.

Question: What’s the difference between me and those creepy old men you see rummaging through dumpsters?
Answer: Not much.

I am in full-on scavenging mode right now. Some of my neighbor/friends are building an addition on to the back of their house and I took the opportunity to extract some goodies from their industrial dumpster, mostly pieces of wood, but I also found a functional screen door. One way or another these newly found materials will get used.

I suppose the resurgence of my desire to scavenge has to do with the steady decline of summer. Temperatures are now only getting up to the 90s for three or four hours in the late afternoon, which is sweet relief compared to the heart of the summer. With cooler temps my need to get outside and build and dig and move things around increases tenfold. The Farm is about to return to life after a long summer of dormancy….